Whether it happens because of a huge fallout or you just happen to drift apart, letting go of a friend is never easy. How do you deal with the loss of a friendship and move on from it? Well, here’s some advice.
Allow yourself to mourn
The worst mistake you can make is to pretend you’re alright when you actually haven’t had time to process this huge change. Allow yourself to mourn the friendship without dwelling too much on what was said or what you wish could’ve been done differently. If there really is no way you can mend things, then you want to give yourself time to fully heal. Be patient with yourself and understand that on some days you might feel a little sadder or even angry and that’s okay — as long as you allow yourself to work through these emotions, you’re on the right track.
Write them a letter
When friendships end abruptly, we may feel like there’s a lot that we were unable to say in the moment and we may really need an outlet. It’s a good idea, then, to write your friend a letter stating how the whole ordeal has made you feel. What do you wish you could’ve done differently? What do you want to apologise for? Do you feel they owe you an apology? Write it all down. You don’t have to send the letter to them afterwards, but you’ll feel a whole lot better once you’ve expressed your feelings.
Do something you enjoy
The loss of a friendship can cut deep and you might feel like you don’t have the strength to go out and have fun — but this could be exactly what you need. Immerse yourself in hobbies, try out something new, take walks in the park every now and then, or join a gym. Find something you enjoy and see this as an opportunity to learn something new and maybe even make a few new friends. Often, uncomfortable changes such as breakups can be catalysts for positive growth and progress in other parts of our lives so it’s good to try to embrace them.
Talk about it
Losing a close friend can sometimes cause feelings of loneliness, but you need to remember that you’re not alone, there’s always someone who’s willing to listen. So, whether it’s a family member, counsellor or us here at CellCgirl, you always have someone you can talk to about what you’re going through and how it makes you feel. Remember to speak your truth, without badmouthing the other party — especially if you’re confiding in a mutual friend.
While a lot of friendships last a lifetime, some don’t quite make it and that’s okay! As much as they may hurt, you can heal from friendship breakups and build more fulfilling bonds with others.